The Burrow and the Bees
by JustHarrySirius
Summary: Short humorous ficlet about the Weasley family, Harry, Hedwig and Hermione. The Twins decide to teach the Golden Trio about the "facts of life." However, things go awry when Harry misinterprets and ultimately gives Mrs. Weasley the bees' honey.


**The Burrow and the Bees**

"Oi!" Fred said to his twin. "Look what we have here?" Fred showed George a bag.

"What's that, my good man?" asked George. Magazines were inside the bag. _Girly_ magazines.

"I think we should have a talk with that lot don't you?" said Fred, grinning. The twins winked at each other.

Harry, Ron and Hermione were playing chess. Well, Ron and Hermione were playing chess while Harry chose to watch. Harry liked watching Ron and Hermione play because of how competitive and relatively quiet they were amid their bickering. Besides, it allowed Harry to relax a little.

"Knight to E5," Ron said.

"Bishop to E7," Hermione said.

Harry looked away outside watching the summer day.

"Hey you lot!" George said grinning at the Golden Trio.

"Uh-oh," Ron said warily. "I know that look."

"What are you two up to?" Hermione asked suspiciously.

Harry frowned slightly at his friends. While he knew the twins were pranksters he couldn't see what all the fuss was about.

"Have any of you heard about the birds and the bees?" Fred asked raising his eyebrows.

"Ugh!" Ron rolled his eyes. "Come on! It's not like any of us _don't_ know what _that_ means!"

Hermione wrinkled her nose in disgust and opened her mouth to retort.

"You mean…" said Harry with growing horror. "Heddy girl's in trouble?"

"Now how in the world did you get _that_ , from _that_?" Ron asked flabbergasted. Hermione blushed but giggled all the same. The twins laughed uproariously.

"HEDDY!" Harry cried. "HEDDY! Come _here_!" as he ran out the door into the summer afternoon. Surprisingly fast on his feet like he was on a broomstick.

"Bloody hell," Ron muttered. "Come on 'Mione!" Harry's friends chased Harry and then stopped. Shocked.

Harry was covered in bee stings and he held a bloody bat in his hand breathing heavily while the other held onto the honeycomb.

"No bees are coming after _my_ bird," Harry said with savage triumph.

The Twins stared at Harry. "Blimey, mate." Fred said.

"You really don't know what-" George said.

"He doesn't have to!" Hermione snapped.

"Know what?" Harry asked, confused.

Mrs. Weasley came by and dropped her package. "Harry, dear!" she exclaimed, rushing over. "What happened?" she demanded, kneeling by Harry.

"Oh, hello Mrs. Weasley," Harry said politely. "Fred, George and Ron said that the birds and the bees were at war so I had to protect Heddy, you see."

Mrs. Weasley's jaw dropped. "The birds and the bees-?" she said slowly, her face pinking, as she glanced at her sons. All of which were very guilty and embarrassed while Hermione glared at them as well.

"Well yes," Harry said surprised. He gleaned that he had gotten his friends in trouble unsuspectingly but unsure of how to fix the problem. "I also remembered you wanted the honeycomb anyway to make jam with. So I thought I'd, er, kill two birds with one stone?" he asked uncertainly.

Mrs. Weasley returned her attention to Harry after giving her sons a _very_ pointed look, indicating that they _would_ discuss this matter later.

"Well, yes, Harry," she said surprised. "That was very sweet of you." She pursed her lips. "But what _exactly_ happened here?"

"Oh, well I climbed up the tree where I thought Heddy was staying." Harry's eyes clouded with worry and anger. "And all I could think was, _not my bird! You'll not go to war on my bird!_ " Harry said, grinding his teeth. "And then I just started killing off all the bees. They stung with a vengeance but I didn't care!" said Harry fiercely. "I'll make sure the trees are safe for _all_ the owls!"

"Uh, mate-" Hermione elbowed Ron. Ron wanted to point out the fact that Hedwig was the smartest owl he'd ever met and that she definitely could defend herself against some bees. Hermione shook her head, unsure of whether to laugh or lecture Harry. She sighed instead, eyeing her friend fondly.

Mrs. Weasley stared at Harry. "Well, dear, that was-that was very _brave_ of you-" she stammered. She was fighting down the urge to laugh, knowing that this was quite serious.

Harry smiled innocently at her. "Oh," Harry said turning to his friends. "What was in the bag?"

Fred and George quickly yelled "Nothing!" and ran off with their bag while Hermione looked just as lost as Harry. Ron whistled as his mother had a knowing look in her sharp brown eyes. She looked at her youngest son with raised eyebrows.

"Uh, come on you lot," Ron stammered. "We still have a chess match to finish and Harry needs medical attention, Mum!"

"Indeed he does," Mrs. Weasley said primly. "Harry, dear, why don't we go inside and I'll make your favorite? Warm milk and treacle tart?"

Harry beamed at her while he carefully walked towards the kitchen with Hermione close by.

Once Mrs. Weasley prepared the ointment for Harry she had Hermione watch the stew. She instructed Ron to help Harry in his room with the bee sting ointment and headed to the master bedroom.

She placed the familiar silencing charm around her bedroom and burst out laughing.

"Oh, Harry!" she said to herself wiping her eyes. "I hope you never change!"


End file.
